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First of all, before even attempting this, there MUST be rapport. I make sure to only do this when I have her in a place where I can LOGISTICALLY CLOSE... (i.e. you and her alone in a locked room (or private place) with little chance of interruption , whether that be at your place or hers or any other setup)...
This is also done as part of the "Impulse Close" to build up the chemistry and sexual tension where there is a phase shift into a sexual state.
The Sexual Value Elicitation format
There are 3 primary components.
1) The Sexual Value: X
The quality itself that a gal enjoys about sex and wants more of. (i.e. Romantic sex, Nasty sex, Bondage sex, taboo sex...)
You would elicit this by asking her a question such as:
"What about sex really turns you on?" or "What makes for really good sex?" or after doing the cube, talk about her horse: "You mentioned that your horse was a black stallion, which means that you're turned on by dark erotic passion... "
2) The Rule: Y
This is the way that she knows that she has that quality... What she/he DOES.i.e. Her PROCESS
"How do you know when you're having really _______ sex or you're feeling really _______? What kind's of things do you do, or does the other person do?" "How do you know that you have this sense of _______ when you're with this person that's closest to you..."
3) Interaction between the Value and the Rule: Z
This is what she were to get from having her sexual quality fulfilled in just the way that she wants it, and what it would be like for her to experience it in just this way... (This gets her rapidly into state! I make sure to anchor to myself, and if possible to use a kinesthetic anchor into which you can incorporate a slide anchor to build intensity.
"So what is it like for you when you have X with this person and you do Y..." or "What do you get out of having X, where you can do Y with this person that you're with..." or So if you had really X sex, and you/this person did Y, what would this be like for you?"
4) Final Step
Now the next step that I do is to repeat back the value, then her rule for the value, and then the interaction between the two as I focus on anchoring and intent.
(Value) = X
(Rule) = Y
(Interaction) = Z
"So when you're with this person where you're having the most X sex, where you're/they're doing Y, and you feel this sense of Z … This is what you really enjoy about it, isn't it..."
Be sure to distinguish their answer as either the value itself or the rule
When you first ask the question, "What about sex really turns you on?" or "What makes for really good sex?" you are trying to elicit the QUALITY. They may give you the RULE.
You must distinguish between the two. Remember the rule is WHAT THEY DO… i.e.
action oriented) If they give you the rule, focus back on eliciting the QUALITY.
1) "What makes for really good sex?" someone may respond with "feeling skin on skin"… (This is really Y... what they DO… the RULE… i.e. HOW THEY KNOW)
Focus back on the quality. "So what does feeling skin on skin mean to you?"
Then they will respond with something like "Closeness". NOW, Closeness (X) is the quality that you are after.
2) "Closeness" (X Quality) … "Skin on skin" (Y Rule) to the Interaction between the two (Z)
"What does it give you to have closeness with this person, where you can feel this skin on skin... ?"
3) "I’d feel complete" (Z Interaction between quality and rule… i.e. WHAT IT GIVES THEM)
4) You then repeat it all back to them as you anchor the state.
"So say that you're with this person who is closest to you, where you feel this closeness, this feeling of skin on skin… where you feel this sense of completion… where this is something that you really enjoy and something that you want to do, isn't it…"
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