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"How do I know if a girl is interested in me? I find it hard to read her attraction to me when I'm so busy trying to show her my self-confidence?"
The key to this question is understanding your correct attitude: You don't NEED her to like you. It's okay to WANT it, but don't become so attached to every encounter with a woman that you end up NEEDING her to like you. That's the train to nowhere, and it will leave soon if you even begin to go that route.
There are many indicators of a girl's interest in you. You just have to know where to look. The primary three are these:
1 - Actions (What she does that indicates her interest obviously)
2 - Words (what she says to you)
3 - Body language (what she does that indicates her interest subtly)
These are also in order. You trust her actions first, her words next, and her body language after that. If you're getting clear buying signals in her actions, ignore her words. If you get interest from her words, ignore her body movements. Your last resort is to interpret her body language.
1) The first indicator is her actions to tell you she likes you. Always watch what she does first, and ignore her words if they don't jive with the way she behaves. Here are a short list of "she's interested" indicators:
- She touches you or leans in close
- She makes it a point to smell your cologne
- She takes you along with her to another bar/dance club
- She initiates conversation with you
- She asks for your number (but only if she asks before or after giving hers. If she refuses to give you her number, she's not interested.)
- She looks you over (especially glances at your mouth)
2) The next thing you listen to is her words. What does she say to you? Here's a list of things that indicate her interest verbally:
- She asks a lot of questions about you
- She talks about sexual topics (without you initiating them)
- She uses very sensual words when describing you
- She tells you secrets (indicating trust)
3) This next list is more difficult, since you will have to refine your radar as to what her body language is saying. It's much more subtle, and more difficult to read. Again, I always suggest that you make sure to judge her body language only when you have no other evidence to help you out.
Here are some buying indicators:
- Occasional glance(s) from far away
- Looks at you a few times (flickering glances at your lips)
- Holds your gaze for a moment with no words
- Looks down, then away
- Goes out of her way to laugh with you
- Posture changes, looks alert
- Covers her mouth or touches her face
- Adjusts hair, attire
- Faces you
- Alert, energetic
- Pupils are dilated
- Open posture (arms uncrossed)
Remember that your primary indication of interest from any woman is in her behavior. No matter what she says, if she isn't DOING the things that a woman that would do who is interested (smiles and talks to you, shows interest, gives you her phone number, etc.) she isn't REALLY interested. She's just trying to not hurt your feelings.
Results are the TRUTH!
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This article has been reproduced with the permission of ©Carlos Xuma®.
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