Do you find that bloody depressing, or motivating and exciting?
I want everyone out there to remember that this situation is entirely under YOUR control.
WOMEN are not the source of your feast or your famine. YOU are.
It's easy to allow yourself to believe that your love life is under the control of "destiny" or some other vehicle of fate, because that allows us to cop out when we need to.
Hey, look, we've all done it. I STILL do it once in a while. It feels a lot better to believe that it's not my fault.
Here's a little quiz:
SITUATION: You're in a bar or at a friend's party, and you see a hot woman that you'd like to meet.
A) You walk over and comfortably start a conversation. She is put at ease, and you eventually get her number and a meeting setup the following week.
B) You walk over and uncomfortably try to start a conversation; she gets uneasy after a while and those dreaded uncomfortable silences creep in. She eventually tells you she has to get back to her friends and walks away.
C) You stay in your chair and find the reasons that she wouldn't be right for you, never taking the risk of connecting with her.
B and C are what happens most of the time to most guys. And it reinforces your inertia the next time you get an opportunity to meet a woman. Do this enough times and you get trapped in what I call the "Downward Spiral."
It's like stage fright. Have you ever had to do something in front of people and find yourself with a serious case of nerves? You're shaking for hours (if not days) before the event. I used to really HATE having to make a presentation. My legs would get really shaky, and my stomach would knot up.
It's unnerving to do these new and different things, but you have to remember that you'll have "butterflies" in your stomach until you get the hang of it. The trick is to get your butterflies to fly IN FORMATION. Make that energy work FOR you, not against you.
You see, once you learn enough about how this game works, you'll feel a new sense of confidence. The nervousness will still be there for a little bit, until you get the hang of engaging in conversation and saying the things that have the right affect on a woman. But now it will give you POWER, not FEAR.
EVERYTHING you've done in your life was new and scary at one point.
Even WALKING was a challenge for you. I remember watching my sister try, using the coffee table as a crutch. She'd wobble and fall, and then keep trying it until she got it. Even if it meant a few dings on her forehead from falling.
We kept trying because we didn't care about what other people thought. We just knew we had to succeed.
What happens to a lot of people is that they will turn down one of two paths in their lives:
PATH 1: They stop risking and trying, because that means that they MIGHT fail. They get addicted to protecting their Bubble of Comfort. They will usually find a way to avoid looking at it this way, though. They prefer to justify their failure in advance (i.e., never act because they already know what would happen), thus "saving" themselves the pain. Instead, they "save" themselves from success and a better life. They become terminally AVERAGE.
PATH 2: They keep risking and learning and growing. They begin to understand that if you're NOT failing in life regularly, you're NOT GROWING at all. They get a taste of the rewards of perseverance and learn one of life's most unknown secrets: The best prizes in life are just an inch past your highest level of reluctance.
If you ever find yourself in a situation where you are afraid to act, ask yourself this one question: WHAT IS THE WORST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN? Then imagine it happening, and ACCEPT IT. Completely accept it and the consequences. Is it really THAT bad?
Once you do that, you'll find that taking action is EASY.
Valentine's Day doesn't have to be lonely or depressing ever again.
If you liked my advice, you'll love my FREE ebook I'm giving away for Seduction Tuition readers:
How To Take The Fear Of Approaching Women
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Like A Bug.
Put your email in the box above and I'll send you my Approach Anxiety eBook directly to your email inbox right NOW.
And, on the next page, I want to explain one of the most painful experiences a guy can go through when approaching women - and how it can be completely avoided...
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This article has been reproduced with the permission of ©Carlos Xuma®.
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