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Here's a conversation I use when seducing chicago girls:

Sabrina: "yeah I like to take showers. So can you take me to a little shower fantasy"

Me: "Sure, but we'd use olive oil instead of water. Olive oil is good for your skin right?"

Sabrina: "I think so-"

Me: "Yeah, but olive oil won't come through the pipes so I'd make you sit in the tub and I dump buckets of warm, hot olive oil down your back you chicago girl."

Sabrina: "hmmmm"

Me: "And slowly the tub would fill up with olive oil... and that warmth would spread all throughout your body... and then we'd jump out and our skin would be all oily and shiny"

Sabrina: "lol"

Me: "And we'd leave olive oil footprints all over the floor as we ran around butt-naked trying to clean it up."

Sabrina: "lol. Yeah, but why waste all that olive oil when we could make a salad out of it?"

Me: "Smart thinking chicago girl, we'd dumped 40 heads of lettuce in there, a few tomatoes, a few onions, and we'd have enough Caesar salad to feed an army."

Sabrina: "lol"

Derek Vitalio

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