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15.6 Grief as a rebound. OFTEN when you don't want a relationship to end and it does anyway you will hold onto the pain as a means of not accepting it as REALLY over. You fantasize about the other person crawling back begging to be with you, because they've seen the error of their ways. Not a good idea, this only prolongs things, focus on YOU and what she did to "complete you" that needs to be complete on its own by your own rethinking of self esteem, goals and ability to succeed. Remember YOU are physically the same now as before you were ever hurting over this woman, only now you aren't used to being you anymore, you are used to being you AND her together. The electricity in that brain of yours lies, true love is new love, not someone sticking around forever in order to fill each others needs. Romance writers of old are responsible for all the pain you've ever felt over lost love, remember monogamy and commitment, even the word "love" are a 100th as old as man, while sex and short pair bonds are timeless. No one ever killed themselves over losing a sex partner until someone decided co-dependant relationships were some mystical bond that must hurt when severed then told and wrote about it.
Just my thoughts on how to stay happy when it comes to love and relationships, tested, used, and approved by me, myself and I. Once I'm complete emotionally, ill find an emotionally complete woman to attempt a permanent bond with. Til then as temporary as possible hot sexual unions, and a little pain in completing myself through future failed relationships and finally the search for the emotionally complete, "semi attractive" woman looks good to me.
WILLPOWER is all you need in life. As a rule try not to fantasize period, fantasy is what tells your super ego that it has what it wants, because you "id" knows it isn't possible. To purposefully fantasize, visualize and imagine things at length is to also tell the "id" that something isn't possible. You must have some slight visualization of anything to create initial desire, but to actively fantasize will only cause you to see something as impossible in the form of diminished willpower. ACTIONS are SPARKED by thoughts, not carried out by them. Thoughts paralyse action after a while. My one life lesson, WILL to do what YOU want in life is all you need.
This isn't rocket science. That's why it can be understood and adapted to various situations.
Look YOUR best, see lone wolf, realize she loves sex, get sexually turned on for her, approach her in sexual state, convey sexual state to her, get to know her while in sexual state, watch for her sexual state, isolate.
Or even easier to remember, 1. be sexual, 2. watch for her sexual state, 3. isolate. Those 3 things are all I take out into the field at a conscious level. The rest has to be filled in to each specific encounter and takes a little practice and time to get ingrained into you. I have seen it work the first run out, by a fucked up looking guy. "Paralysis by analysis" can be deadly to the willpower, so get on the ball, stop reading and take those 3 phrases, inside your head, out in the field with you and get laid.
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And remember "make the ho say no".
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