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The nature of attraction
Because womens’ attraction must be sublimated below the level of conscious awareness in order for the plausible deniability system to have any prayer of ending in a lay, women aren’t necessarily aware of their own attraction as a sexual thing. When a woman is attracted to you, she feels it as a fascination - even a compulsion - that doesn’t necessarily involve any direct thoughts of sex; this is not to say that it has nothing to do with sex, or that she doesn’t want sex, simply that practical necessity requires her to cram that undercurrent of sexuality down below the level of conscious thought.
The common male misconception that women don’t want sex is a result of men buying into the lies that women tell themselves.
Points of critical mass
So you’re gaming some girl. Your attract game is 100% on, you’ve got it - whatever ‘it’ is - you are so hot that drinks are turning to steam when you walk near them. You are doing the kind of hot, dirty things to the inside of her mind that you would like to be doing to the inside of her body.
Pressure. Dissonance. Urges rise to the surface from her semi-conscious mind, from a dark animal arena of want and she is desperate. For sex. With you. And yet, these urges can’t acceptably involve sex. So what does she want?
She wants to get closer to you. And then she wants to get even closer. And she wants you to pay attention to her. And she wants you to touch her.
And yet, as this momentum of compliance builds, so does the pressure. Because every step closer to you, every escalation, is a subcommunication that she just may have accepted your intention to fuck her.
Before your very eyes, if you dig the whole Freudian shtick, you are watching the battle of superego versus id.
ASD alarms go off. Red lights flash. Her system - the system that balances net gain against net loss - is out of balance. She rationalizes as hard as she can and still - STILL - she hits a point where the subcommunication that the ASD conditions are being violated hits -critical mass-.
And what then?
Well, then it’s time to correct course.
Points of correction: SHIT TESTS
If a social situation seems to be rolling out of control, into territory that is not covered by any contingency on the list above but for some reason she is unwilling to eject, a girl must take CORRECTIVE MEASURES to maintain plausible deniability:
In other words, shit tests.
The exact nature of the shit test in question depends on social factors too numerous and complex to lay out, assuming I could explain, but may be something along the lines of the following:
“So my boyfriend says that… blah blah blah”
“I know what you’re doing”
“I’m not going to sleep with you.”
“Are you a player?”
Et cetera. Et cetera.
What you are supposed to understand, as a player, is that these shit tests have nothing to do with you. These are purely a barometer of the forces at work -inside- her head; like a tea kettle whistling as it lets off steam, they are the product of a natural process.
She is taking steps - socially reflexive steps - to maintain internal equilibrium. This involves maintaining plausible deniability by subcommmunicating (or outright stating, if you’ve thrown her off that badly) that one or both of the ASD conditions are NOT true; she’s aware of your intent, she’s not going to fuck you, or what have you. It may look like she’s making some kind of direct or indirect statement about whether she’ll have sex with you, but in fact what she’s saying is, “I am a woman and my system is out of whack and saying this - by indicating to you that I do not have unacceptable intentions - will make me feel better.”
The reason you can fail shit tests is because when you try to deal with them ‘rationally’, as though they were an effort at communication and not an emotionally corrective measure, you light up a big neon sign over your head that says “I DO NOT KNOW THE SCORE”. Suddenly, it is no longer a conspiracy of silence between you and a girl. Instead of a socially intelligent kind of guy, you are some jerk who managed to get into the clubhouse by accidentally guessing the secret word.
Don’t be that guy.
Make it a conspiracy, instead; a conspiracy between you and your girl. Hide her from her inhibitions, and your rewards will be many and hot.
Be the man.
She’s not going to.
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