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I’m not really one for writing detailed LRs, but I wanted to break this one down just to demonstrate what is possible in Day Game. It’s also a good reminder of how far I’ve come. To think that a few years ago I couldn’t even imagine talking to a beautiful young woman in the cold light of day, let alone sleeping with one on the same day I met her, is incredible.
There are two themes to this story that are important for developing your skills with women (and indeed, improving any area of your life): Experimentation and Persistence.
Whenever you get good at something, you will find you periodically reach a plateau in your skill level. At this stage, you need to experiment and start trying different methods and techniques. In this case, I wanted to experiment with daytime physical escalation. I normally advocate that my students avoid serious kino (physical touching) in Day Game until they are on a date with the girl. But I was curious to see whether I could kiss girls quickly in the daytime and still seduce them.
The second theme is persistence. It is important to realize that when you think something should be possible, you need to be persistent in order to achieve it. 99% of people don’t have enough determination and will give up too soon. But if you really believe something can work and you persist at it, eventually you will crack the secret. That’s how I originally got into Day Game.
The Holland Trip & Real Man Conference 2008
SmoothDoc from the Dutch Seduction Lair invited my good friend Dr Yen and me to visit him in Holland to give a talk to the Dutch Lair. I’d never met this guy before, but was completely in awe of him when I did. He’s putting together the Real Man Conference 2008, which is an international summit for guys wanting to improve their skills with women.
What really impressed me about SmoothDoc was his devotion to the event. He’s not even sure if he’s going to make any money from it. He already has the lifestyle he wants: a lovely house in the suburbs, a flash car and a loving and beautiful wife. He tells me he is putting together the conference because it is his dream. He equates it to seeing a beautiful woman on the street and thinking, “I have to approach her, I have to try.” For him, this conference is the same deal. There’s nothing I respect more in a man than determination and integrity.
Hanging out with Dr Yen is great. He came to one of my London lair talks about half a year back and has now become a good friend. It’s amazing when you teach someone something and then you watch as they develop it and improve upon it until they have their own unique style.
Dr Yen is a powerhouse of sexual energy. Skinny with bleached blond rock star hair, he is the Italian Stallion of the modern era. He tells me about pushing physical escalation boundaries on the street at night and how this helps him to filter out the girls that aren’t going to go home with him.
It sounds intense but exciting. I normally make it a rule not to escalate physically with a girl in Day Game until we’re on an instant date. But I have started to wonder how fast and far I can push things physically in the daytime.
I am doing a few street sets the first day I’m in Amsterdam when I spot a beautiful girl wearing sexy, big sunglasses sitting at a table outside a coffee shop. I go over and run one of my standard direct openers, “Excuse me, you are so gorgeous I had to come and say hello” – she opens up like a can of beans. A few minutes later, I’m taking her number and trying to establish a logistical plan for spending more time with her.
She tells me she’s going to Paris early tomorrow morning, so I’m thinking either I try to sleep with her this afternoon or when she’s back from Paris a day later. I have to get back to Dr Yen, so I take her number and leave. A little while later I meet her at the station for a few minutes and just think, “Fuck it, go for the kiss.” It’s broad daylight and I’ve interacted with her for all of four minutes, but all I can think about is pushing things as far and fast as I can.
I look at her, start giving her my seduction eyes, lean in slowly to kiss each cheek, pull back, and then pull her in to kiss me on the lips. There’s tension and some resistance, but my lips touch hers. There’s more resistance, so I add in some tongue and her resistance falters. She is mine.
I try texting and calling her to meet me when she comes back from Paris, but she flakes. Damn it. I conclude that I pushed too far in the initial interaction without having good enough logistics to continue it. The rapid daytime makeout needs modification, but I am determined to make it work.
Next up is a Chinese girl with a loose green top that doesn’t leave much to the imagination. I open her on the street and start touching her arms and hands immediately. There is resistance, but I keep talking and making her laugh. I tease her by saying that she wore those clothes on purpose so that I would approach her.
Once I’ve got her giggling, I convince her to come have a drink with me. Something about her top and billowing breasts possess me while we sit there in the hot sun, and suddenly I turn into super kino escalation guy. My hands are ALL over her and at first there is resistance, but then she starts to enjoy it and keeps saying, “This is so crazy!” I keep going for the makeout, but there is even more resistance. I am fighting through it like a trooper. I start kissing her neck and whispering all the naughty things I want to do to her into her ear. It’s about 3pm, broad daylight outside, and I’ve known this girl for all of ten minutes.
I convince her to come to my hotel room another twenty minutes later. Then I have to wait until Dr Yen gets out. While he is getting ready, I build some meagre comfort with the girl. When Yen leaves, I caveman her onto the bed. There’s more resistance and ultimately she refuses to have sex with me. Damn it. This time I had the logistics, but I didn’t have the comfort. With some seriously blue balls at this stage, I resolve to make the rapid daytime makeout work.
Yen and I decide to hit up the free music festival in The Hague. Festivals are awesome because everyone is always in such a good mood. I spot a beautiful young brunette girl on the tram over there, but she’s too far away to open.
We get off the tram and a few minutes later I notice she’s just in front of me walking slowly by herself. Boom! A girl walking slowly is always a good sign for a Same Day Lay; they’re typically in a slightly dreamlike state, almost waiting for something exciting to happen to them. It also means she’s not in a rush to go meet anyone either, which means you could be the person she spends the rest of the afternoon with.
One of the great things about Day Game is that once you get over your approach anxiety, it’s actually very simple and easy to strike up a conversation with a beautiful woman. In most situations you can either use a Direct or a Situational Opener and then transition off it with something interesting and/or funny. My goal is to make a girl laugh within the first minute or two of the interaction; that way she’ll completely relax and happily continue talking with me.
Dr Yen runs off to open some blonde girl in pink tights. I walk up behind the young brunette girl and tap her lightly on the arm from behind.
Soul: Hey, my friend has just gone to chat up that girl over there, so I’m bored and need company. How are you?
Her: Oh, ok [smiling]. I’m fine thanks.
Soul: So have you been to this festival before?
Her: No, it’s my first time.
Soul: Awesome, me too. I’m in Holland for the weekend, I love it here. Everyone is so cute and friendly. I love the Dutch accent too. It always sounds like you guys are talking with your mouth full!
Soul: Where are your friends? [I’m establishing logistics]
Her: I’m meeting a friend a bit later, but just thought I’d come by myself for a bit and wait until she gets here.
Soul: [*Ding ding ding* A girl walking around by herself is waiting to be swept off her feet] Wow, that’s brave of you to come to a huge festival by yourself. I really like that kind of independence in a woman.
Her: [Beaming smile] Thanks!
I continue walking and talking with her. Five minutes later I’m wondering whether I can kiss her or not. I always tell my students, “Don’t be someone who makes assumptions as to whether something is possible or not, be willing to test those assumptions with your actions.”
So I stop her, tell her that she has amazing skin, and stroke a lock of her hair back. No reaction. She just keeps on looking at me. It’s a good sign. I lean in and she reciprocates. We kiss, softly and gently at first, and then more voraciously. I learned my lesson from the previous daytime makeouts, so I pull away a few seconds later. I am not going to make the mistake of doing too much, too soon.
I take her by the hand and we keep on walking and talking. I run my standard comfort and kino escalation stuff – we sit down on the grass, listen to the music and I put my arms around her and stroke her gently. I find out all about her passions, her interests, where she has travelled, and what she wants to be when she grows up. I tell her a bit about myself, without giving too much away.
Girls don’t need to know all the details about you. They just want to see some evidence that you could be the kind of man they spend time with. What this is exactly varies from woman to woman, but there are certain characteristics that are almost universally attractive, such as passion, ambition, determination, adventurousness and integrity.
We keep walking and eventually meet up with her friend. I tell her that I’d love to spend more time with her and seed the idea of having drinks at my hotel later on in the evening. When you seed an idea like this early on, it achieves two things. It tests the water to see how they react to the idea and it makes it seem smoother later on when it’s actually time to move back to your place.
I start setting sexual frames as well to make sure that she understands (on an emotional level) that we are going to be intimate. I tell her I am going to kiss her delicious skin all over, and that she’s going to enjoy running her hands over my muscular, taut body. She is smiling and says, “That sounds nice.” It’s on.
I go catch up with Dr Yen while she goes off with her friend. I leave them to chill for a while, and then tell her to come meet me outside the festival. We get in a tram and head back to my hotel.
Once we get inside, she looks at me, and says, “I have to tell you something.” I’ve heard these words enough times to know what’s coming. “I’m a virgin,” she says.
I’ve been with plenty of virgins in the past, and I’m grateful to have learnt from my mistakes enough to give every virgin I meet a great first time. The old adage, “Leave them better than you found them,” is never more relevant than with a virgin.
Soul: [Big, warm smile] That’s ok. We don’t have to do anything that you don’t want to. I’m going to take care of you tonight, ok honey?
Her: I know. That’s why I came home with you. I just felt so comfortable with you. This is crazy. I’ve never slept with any of my boyfriends before. I always lied and told them I was waiting for the one, but I don’t think I was. I think I just needed someone to make me feel as comfortable as you have.
I look at her, smile, and lead her by the hand to my bed. I say, “Let’s get into bed,” and we take off our clothes.
I spend the next half hour making the softest, gentlest and most sensual love to her. Once I’m sure she’s enjoying it and it’s not hurting her, I shift up a few gears and pound her into the bed.
I get this text from her when she gets home,
“Hey Jeremy, how are you? I just wanted to let you know that I really loved spending time with you. This night was amazing, just as you are. I wish you and your friend a good time in Amsterdam. We’ll stay in touch. Xx”
It was a beautiful day outside and night had just begun to fall.
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