For most guys turning on attraction in women is like visiting a foreign land. They don't know the language, understand the moves or read the signs. But most obvious is that most guys start at the wrong airport and don't have a clue how to even start the trip.
Sometimes I get some emails, and I can so feel where the guy is coming from. And I'm talking about the emails where the guy is just honestly confessing the insane level of frustration he is feeling. And this takes GUTS to do this, to be HONEST about wanting to IMPROVE his situation.
I remember all these relationship troubles, I remember it good. Whenever I read these emails, I wish I could somehow snap my fingers and just BE there in PERSON to CHANGE the guy's entire CONCEPT of what is going on, because that is the real problem.
I could tell him to download my eBook, but his concept of reality is so far off that he doesn't even BELIEVE yet. So a guy can go for years before being READY to accept a new perspective, before being READY to really download and read the eBook and understand it fully.
Let me give you an excerpt of a recent email I got from a guy who had a negative experience with a couple of women, one from online and one in real life:
"Perhaps there are other reasons, and there are plenty of women around to meet, but my point is, aren't we men up against a level of arrogance that is at an all time high ? Isn't this maybe too much for us to take on ? I think there was a time that the average young female might have been impressed to go out with a university educated person. Now, what impresses them ? What will they compromise on ? Anything can be a deal breaker...Pets, saying something to their kid (no matter how ridiculous the kid is being), anything at all?"
Any of that sound familiar to you?
OK. Now, listen to my next words VERY CAREFULLY, and I mean them only in the best sense of CHANGING YOUR REALITY:
I can already tell from your email a BUNCH of things, but PRIMARILY the MAIN THING GOING WRONG HERE is that you are treating this whole women thing with a CEREBRAL attitude.
And by that, I mean you are coming across as BORING.
It's as simple as THAT.
You think that by piling on the university degrees, the good "being able to compromise" behaviour, and possibly by having money, you are going to appeal to women.
Because all this stuff LOGICALLY sounds like "GOOD THINGS".
These are the things you have been told your whole life that you should have, to get a woman to want to be with you, etc.
And yeah, there are a few folks who get a LITTLE "action" or "results" that way, i.e. a dude is a doctor or something, but honestly THAT kind of result is more of a woman being LOGICAL, and saying "hmm, I SHOULD be with this guy" which is very different from a woman feeling "I MUST BE WITH THIS GUY BECAUSE I WANT HIM BADLY".
You see, the truth is you really don't want a woman to be with you for LOGICAL reasons, crazy as that sounds. You want her to be INSANE about you, not logical at all. You want her to be EMOTIONAL about you. You don't want her to be with you because after she looks at her mathematical charts, she comes to some kind of logical "conclusion" to be with you.
See, you already KNOW DEEP DOWN, that you don't even CARE or WANT a woman to be with you for LOGICAL reasons, right? You want her to be MADLY CRAZY WILD ABOUT YOU.
So why the *%#! would you try to attract a woman with all this useless logical stuff?
You have to leave behind all that stuff, because it has NOTHING to do with ATTRACTION.
ATTRACTION lives in another DIMENSION. You have to BLAST OFF from the land of boring anti-attraction stuff, you have to blast off with raging engines that are burning an inferno of thrust to get you away from there.
ONLY then will you make it past the heavy gravity of the anti-attraction dimension, and break on through to the other dimension of sexy exciting intriguing passionate ATTRACTION.
You mention that we men are up against a really high level of ARROGANCE. This is both TRUE and NOT TRUE.
From a hottie woman's point of view, she is not being arrogant, she is just going out of her MIND with BORING guys who KEEP ON WASTING HER TIME, AND MAKING HER FEEL WEIRD, AND TRYING TO TAKE FROM HER. And these guys get upset when she doesn't do CARTWHEELS for them.
Also, to be honest, some women really have low self esteem, just like some men, and they radiate mean vibes, but the interesting thing I've found is that the meanest girls are usually not the hottest ones! Which makes sense, because the hotties have more validation from people that makes the hottie feel good about herself.
The crazy thing is that once you ENTER the reality of a hottie, you start to understand that they are not being ARROGANT so much as simply HAVING STANDARDS.
You would have SIMILAR arrogance/standards if women everywhere were creeping you out by wanting to be with you without even KNOWING you. Yeah, you THINK it would be cool, but imagine this happened 24/7, and imagine the women were NOT hot.
You would start to INSTINCTIVELY learn to separate the DESIRABLES from the undesirables. It wouldn't be a LOGICAL process, it would be EMOTIONAL, it would be INSTANT.
If a woman didn't FEEL good, you would REJECT HER FAST. That's the only way you would be able to deal with the ocean of attention you were getting.
Only a FEW would make it, only the TOP few who made EMOTIONAL IMPACT would make it to the "interview" stage, and only the top of the top would make it "all the way".
And of course, all this would make you SHIFT your attitude, from wanting sex, to wanting to CUT DOWN on all the sexual partner potential applicants. You would SCREEN women like crazy, you would have to learn to "HOLD OUT" or you would end up having sex 24/7, with everyone.
You have to UNDERSTAND THIS STUFF, it runs DEEP
Of course, women having these "high standards" and "arrogance" only MAKE the problem WORSE, because this type of behaviour implies SCARCITY and SUPERIORITY, so most guys CHASE EVEN HARDER.
And they CHASE without even having a clue of how to BEHAVE attractive in every other sense. It's not just the CHASING that is wrong, but the entire act is wrong- the clothing, the behaviours, the neediness, the total predictablity, the total lack of originality, and the TOTALLY WRONG EMPHASIS on trying to prove all the things you mentioned, such as "having a great job, being a great compromising person, having a great degree, etc."
Of course, all those things like a great job are GOOD THINGS, it's just that on their own, they are not going to get you ATTRACTION. And being a CRUEL and BORING JERK is not going to attract most women.
Our current society has allowed women to SHINE, and yet has told men to metaphorically castrate themselves and actually be SUBMISSIVE to women, by maintaining standards of "respect" and "courtship" that only made sense and worked in a different era when women had a very different role.
It's amazing, as women are socially allowed to be MORE sexual (although they still have to maintain a certain public "image" that is very strange when you think about it, and it's important as a guy you understand this) women are MORE assertive, MORE "take what I want", MORE demanding, MORE original with style and fashion, MORE EVERYTHING, and yet what are most MEN?
In general, they are LESS in EVERY one of those areas:
They act NON-SEXUAL with women.
They are SUBMISSIVE with women, trying to win their approval.
They are DRESSED boring.
They frame their life around how to please a woman, while the woman is busy figuring out how to make the most selfish use of her life because the guy is standing around kissing her ass no matter what she does anyway!
And all this creates a never ending negative cycle of the guy trying harder with the same wrong strategies to get a result, and the woman pushing the guy farther away, which only intensifies the guy's attraction.
THE ANSWER TO ALL THIS INSANITY is NOT to try to CHANGE WOMEN.
No, not at all.
That change comes INSTANTLY the moment YOU change.
And I'm not talking about CHANGING who you "are". Unless you really think you are a submissive, lowly, boring, undeserving, creature that OWES women your dignity. If you do think that, go pour a few buckets of freezing cold water over yourself every day and night until you wake up from that nightmare. Of course, consult with your doctor before doing this.
So what is the OPPOSITE OF THE LOGICAL BORING USELESS STUFF???
HERE'S WHAT IT IS:
FORGET ABOUT THE LONG TERM
Yeah, this was a HUGE pill for me to swallow, because I just wanted to have ONE GOOD WOMAN that I could RELY upon.
You have NO CLUE how MASSIVELY this messed me UP.
It allowed any woman I seriously considered to TAKE MASSIVE ADVANTAGE of the fact that I was willing to "make it work" because I was seriously considering the future, and I knew that to make things work, you can't fight all the time.
It caused me to ACCEPT bullshit, to rationalize a woman's bad behaviour, and the girls took advantage of this.
It also made me focus on LOGICAL practical things, like "spending time together", and showing a woman I was a good long term partner by treating her extremely well without her EARNING it. Of course, the bull*&*% of our society that says that women WANT this serious stuff also messed me up.
The lie that women WANTED the stable, secure, long term stuff, made me focus on all that, which TOTALLY ROBBED me of the power of creating DRAMA, MYSTERY, UNPREDICTABILITY, and in fact, it made me sacrifice some of my ambitions at the time because I felt it was "worth it" to be with a good woman. I also tried to be as conservative as possible, because all that "rock n roll" stuff was SINFUL and NOT RIGHT, AND not what a GOOD WOMAN would appreciate, etc.
SCREW IT ALL!
The IRONY is that if you do the OPPOSITE, you will not only have a BLAST, but you will also GENERATE the attraction so that women WANT the whole serious relationship thing, and the greatest IRONY of all is that at that point, you won't give a RAT'S ASS for a while about relationships, because you will feel so great about having so many choices, that you are not about to jump into something serious so fast.
Plus you will for a short while think women are crazy, and it will take a while for you to relax and realize that women are not crazy, it was just your PERSPECTIVE of reality was crazy. You'll realize it was a LIE based on old modes of behaviour that were maintained for some bizarre reason, in an era where they no longer made sense.
(The reason has to do with men not wanting to come across as being evil and against the women's movement, but the thing is, women having power should not mean YOU having NO power through being a boring, submissive, needy slave.)
So FORGET relationships, until you learn how to create ATTRACTION.
ATTRACTION requires VALUE. And most guys' desire for a serious relationship comes from wanting to end a LACK of women in their life. And women SENSE THIS.
THIS REEKS OF INFERIORITY.
It's DIFFERENT if you KNOW you can get women, and women KNOW it, and sense it from your dominant cocky and upbeat confident vibe.
That's why, when you already have tons of choices, you are coming from a totally different place emotionally internally, and if you still want a relationship then, and the woman is a great woman, hey go for it man.
So instead of chasing a relationship, think about how crazy that is, and what it really means about your beliefs in scarcity, and your ability to attract women.
Instead of chasing that long term thing, PUSH IT AWAY, and see how much FUN you can have NOW. This will strip away a lot of the excess LOGICAL unfun baggage you are bringing to your interactions, and it will instead bring a VITALITY to your interactions.
It will also get rid of things like jealousy or neediness or possessiveness, because you aren't FOCUSING on that stuff, you are too busying having FUN. And the moment a woman is not FUN, you will NATURALLY, HAPPILY, NOT BE ANGRY, because it allows you to move on to another great fun woman, however usually you will find that the same woman you moved away from is suddenly chasing you and improving her behaviour to try to impress you and win you over.
And suddenly you will see how the relationship offers come POURING in.
And you will not be jumping at these offers, you will be asking yourself things like, "Why should I get into a relationship with her" and she will try real hard to give you all the reasons!
GIVE WOMEN THE DRAMA THEY NEED AND YOU WILL ENJOY ANYWAY
So you see a super hottie somewhere?
You're thinking of confessing your love to her, or how great you would be to her?
What the heck does that mean?
It means you think the gap between your value and her value is huge.
And that's not good.
Not for you.
Not for her.
In fact, it's repulsive to her.
If she sees you are busy with other women, she will like you MORE, not less. The other thing is that this should not be an ACT.
You should be ENJOYING meeting lots of women.
The DRAMA you give women also comes from you developing all the various cool dimensions of your personality, which is a huge topic as well.
DRAMA is just another word for EMOTIONALLY COMPELLING.
I'll end with one more important one:
BE SOAKING IN SEXUAL AND POWERFUL VIBES
You know, we are SUCH a repressed society, and it's funny because we have SO MUCH nudity and sex around us, through advertising billboards and porn and you name it.
In fact, all this external fake sexuality seems to only push the real sexuality further into the land of repression. As if it's okay to exist on billboards, but not in real life. In fact, the billboards often show women with "you can't have me" expressions, which of course make them more attractive to most guys, who fall for that.
But yet, even with all this stuff around, we tend to SHUT IT OFF completely from our normal interactions. Most people dress boring. Talk boring. Boring hobbies, if any. Trying to FIT IN and CONFORM. And we are not PASSIONATE, we are not HAPPY or EXCITED except for the "official times" and places.
A good zombie society.
We don't pursue our dreams or passions. We don't want to take any emotional risks, not realizing that this is the biggest risk of all, unless you want to emotionally sleep through life.
The only kind of diversity we have is ridiculous politically correct diversity, but no REAL SEXY FUN EXCITING INTRIGUING diversity. Everyone is a wannabe or a copycat.
So instead, dress in the coolest clothing YOU find, and don't be afraid to make a dirty joke or even tease her that she is trying to get you into bed. You see, that's what women have been doing to guys for the longest time, and it was totally cool, so now it's time to take back the frame, because the reality is that it IS the time to do it, for the scales have shifted.
The greatest irony is that women find all this EXCITING, so it's time to get started giving women and yourself
the good times that you both deserve!
And if you would like to start getting results TONIGHT, I can think of no better way than by downloading my eBook IMMEDIATELY. This book is the DNA of attraction, PACKED with the info you NEED to KNOW to get RESULTS with women.
Download it now at:
Inside, you'll learn:
-How to trigger attraction instantly.
-How to approach women and create "instant dates."
-How to get physical.
-How to handle tests.
-How to create a powerful sense of connection.
-And much, much more.
2. The Real World Bootcamp
In the Real World Bootcamp, I will serve as your exclusive instructor for three days and nights as you learn everything about pick up in real world venues such as taverns, bookstores, clubs, and the street. If you want to learn all the complex dynamics of attracting a woman and taking her through all the stages of the rollercoaster, then it's best to learn from someone who's actually "in the ring" on a regular basis and DOES it for real, and knows what he's talking about so that he can fill in all the CONTEXT that's missing from what you might be reading elsewhere. You can now do that in my ONE-ON-ONE bootcamps where I will work exclusively with you in real venues such as clubs, malls, streets, cafes, and even trains and buses.
The bootcamp will get you to where you want to be in the most efficient manner possible. I'll teach you HOW to deal with all the unpredictable situations that can arise, I'll show you HOW to deal with challenges such as loud music where it's difficult to be heard, and HOW to actually isolate girls, HOW to deal with her friends, and of COURSE how to pick up in daytime as well. And you'll also get to learn how to REALLY create a natural vibe to the whole interaction so that she doesn't feel weird about meeting you the next time.
I wish somebody could have taught me all this stuff at one shot over a weekend instead of having to learn it piece by piece, from various different guys and from tons of my own mistakes and experiences over YEARS. During those years, it was often like walking blindfolded into the lion's cage, where I got ripped apart. If you want to avoid the feeling of being punched in from all sides at once, and if you want to learn as fast as possible, I recommend you sign up for the bootcamp as soon as you can.
Till next time,
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This article has been reproduced with the permission of ©Michael W and The Dating Wizard®
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