I have a little secret for you: No one really cares about money, looks, status, or anything else like that.
What women, and in fact men as well, DO care about are the INSTANT EMOTIONS they get or THINK they will get from these things. Believe it or not, the major difference between a person like Mother Theresa and a person who is some tramp is just the EMOTION they attach to different actions.
The fact of the matter is that most human beings find emotions very addictive. Even negative emotions are often addictive, because the intensity of the emotion tends to make you feel like you should CONTINUE to feel that negative emotion, that it’s INSANE TO NOT continue to feel that negative emotion.
That’s why when people are in a depressed mood, they listen to depressing music to REINFORCE it since they FEEL it’s just
“right” and FEELS RIGHT.
Such is the power of emotion, that even NEGATIVE emotions are addictive.
Experiencing emotion makes you feel ALIVE. That’s why the entertainment industry is a billion dollar industry. That’s why Spiderman rakes it in while some other special effects movie goes bankrupt- because effects alone trigger VERY LITTLE EMOTION. For most people, it is so easy to get them emotional, that they will easily listen to HARMFUL advice from a person who delivers the advice in a way that taps EMOTION.
Think of some of the worst dictators in history. Think of the nicotine industry. In both cases, by appealing to people’s emotions, people end up EXCITED to do destructive behavior to themselves and to others.
At the same time, emotions can be used in a POSITIVE way, since they are so powerful.
For example, I remember a documentary called PUMPING IRON where Arnold Schwarzenneger was explaining the feeling of a muscle burn. He went on with great passion to explain the feeling of pain from a muscle burning- and that knowing the pain was a sign of his body pushing itself to respond and improve, the pain was actually pleasurable.
Anyone who loves working out knows what I am talking about, but the more important point is that he harnessed the power of EMOTION to turn something that would DISCOURAGE other people and actually ENCOURAGE him. Smart dude.
So what does all this have to do with attracting women?
It has everything to do with it.
If emotions are so powerful and addictive, you can imagine the power of the emotion called SEX, which is such a primal instinctive thing. Unfortunately though, most people let the emotion of sex control them, instead of learning to harness this emotion in productive ways.
For some people, the emotion of sex can make them depressed, as they associate it with past painful emotional experiences. For others, they associate it with power and thus feel the need to “conquer” another woman every day. For others, they associate it with being “bad”. For some, they associate it with escape. Others associate it with self-esteem.
You can see the problems this might lead to and the behavior patterns that might result.
Sex itself is actually none of these things, and in all the above cases, sex has taken control over the individual instead of vice versa.
The bottom line though is that SEX ITSELF is a POWERFUL RAW EMOTION, but how it gets harnessed is up to the individual. Think of absolute value, it can go negative or positive, but the intensity of the absolute value remains unchanged.
Now, I believe that the emotion of sex is so powerful, that it can be experienced at TRILLIONS of different levels besides sex itself that are JUST AS POWERFUL as the raw act. This is why a certain LOOK on someone’s face can be EXTREMELY POWERFUL. This is why a movie like TITANIC can break every record ever made. This is why guys (and plenty of women) love movies like TERMINATOR where the macho guy who isn’t too emotional otherwise comes across time to save this woman, and why women (and plenty of guys) love movies like TITANIC.
In both cases, the stories about more than bullets and sinking ships. Movies that are just about bullets and sinking ships go straight to video and nobody talks about them. At the very HEART of these movies is a powerful, innovative, subtle expression of SEX that works on a soul-to-soul level between audience and film. The film CREATES emotions, and it's not even REAL, it's just plastic running on a projector.
It is YOUR job to work on an EQUALLY powerful level with the woman or women in YOUR life. To use the emotion of sex in a subtle, yet powerful way. Now, what I am sharing with you is very powerful stuff, and I don’t believe in using these powers to hurt women. I believe in using these powers to enhance your connection with the woman or women you care about.
By the way, one of the reasons the emotions in a film or book or piece of music are so powerful is because MANY emotions are combined together. In the movie examples above, there is
the emotion of loss since in both cases the romance was in JEOPARDY, thereby increasing the passion and appreciation for the romance; there is also the emotion of DANGER, the emotion of FREEDOM, and I could go on and on. Bottom line for the sake of this newsletter is that emotions become even MORE powerful when they are combined with OTHER emotions.
Kind of like how a symphony gives you a greater experience of Mozart than playing it on your lone banjo.
Or how a comedian works on different levels of humor at the same time, and even will act SERIOUS as he builds up to his hilarious punchline… Again, the COMBO of emotions you are experiencing ENHANCES the effect. Similarly, when interacting with a woman, you want her to be experiencing a WILDSTORM of emotions that just makes you UNBELIEVABLY ADDICTIVE. All these emotions must be interwoven with SUBTLE sexual lacing.
By the way, when I say addictive, I do not mean in a harmful or mean-spirited way, I am saying it in a POSITIVE way where both you and your woman will be NUTS about each other.
I LOVE triggering AWESOME EMOTIONS. Truth be told, my overall goal in life is not just about creating awesome emotions with women, it’s about creating rare, powerful, positive emotions in this world that are simultaneously HONEST. In other words, I could never write a story about a “nice” guy who wins with women, because to me that’s NOT HONEST.
So HOW do you trigger all these awesome INFINITE and DIFFERENT sexually-laced emotions in a woman?
Obviously, this is a HUGE question with a HUGE answer.
But for one thing, just like a FILM or BOOK creates emotion by using REPRESENTATIONS of reality, so too your behaviour, your words, your attitude, your clothing, your tonality, all are REPRESENTATIONS of reality as well. Those representations are all you have to convey who you are. It's really no different from "looks" because "looks" too are just a REPRESENTATION of reality that gets interpreted by a woman's mind.
Another thing that's crucial to do before go trying to create sexy representations of yourself is you must understand and know the TRUTH about what women find sexy, and I ASSURE YOU that most women will either not be able to tell you since they aren’t conscious of it, and even if they DID know, (and most women honestly DON’T), they would NOT find you attractive if they had to TELL you, and also would not feel COMFORTABLE telling you. Being THE MAN is not ONLY about not taking any crap, although that is VERY important part, make no mistake about it.
It’s also about delivering the message that you are powerful in other subtle ways, ranging from powerful in intelligence, to powerful in emotional control, to the way you physically present yourself and the way you dress. The keyword is SUBTLETY. The more you make a woman have to ENGAGE herself in figuring you out and wanting to figure you out, the better. Being direct is too easy and too boring and is simply bypassed by her emotional radar.
Think for a second about the coolest heroes in movies. Imagine James Bond even if he wasn’t rich or played by a movie star. Think about the guy, the stories he has to tell, the knowledge he has of human character, of the world, of politics, of culture, of languages, and how he never seems to show off about it. It’s just who he is.
Think about how he might CONVEY all that to a woman WITHOUT even TELLING her he knows all that stuff. For example, let’s say a woman met the guy, and asked him what he did, and he answered “oh a little of this and a little of that” with a slight smirk on his confident face as he then casually turned from her and ordered himself a martini. He might then slowly turn back and say “and yourself…”.
Trust me, this says a LOT about a guy, and it would be attractive even if he didn’t have all the gadgets looks and money. Notice how in my example he didn’t even ANSWER the question, yet he wasn’t rude, yet DEFINITELY conveyed he was THE MAN.
By not answering he created an air of mystery while not coming across as a lame prick. And imagine he ordered an exotic drink that most guys have no idea what it even is.
And think about the voice tone he probably used- it was relaxed and natural and at ease. A hint of playfulness in his voice. Totally in control without being controlling.
I hope this is giving you a glimpse into who THE MAN is.
How do you think he might CONTINUE this interaction to take it to the NEXT LEVEL?
Do you think this guy is obsessing over getting phone numbers or emails?
Do you think he is even giving off the VIBE that he wants her NUMBER and is going to go home so happy that he has her NUMBER?
Do you think SHE is thinking he will be so ecstatic that he has her number?
Or might this entire interaction quickly lead to MORE than a “number”?
By the way, I have nothing against getting numbers, it’s often the only way when two people are busy at the moment. But my point is that it’s not about numbers or emails, it’s about ATTRACTION in its most full and complex forms. That means MORE than just horniness. Using just horniness is for amateurs, no offence. An unattractive woman touching might make you horny, but does that mean you are really attracted?
Do you think he might escalate things smoothly by continuing to having an INTRIGUING conversation, or PLAYFUL conversation, or maybe just sharing an INTERESTING story that just happened to him?
He might be playful and bust on her that “I could tell you but then you know what I’d have to do with you” or he could be intriguing and share an interesting story about something that happened to him or someone he knew.
He might smoothly sit close to her as they chatted, and at the RIGHT moment know when to touch, and know when it was ON to kiss her, and he would do it without asking for permission while being VERY classy.
Compare this to something to something lame like telling her how hot she is?
Let’s say he saw her with her two girlfriends at the bar and they were laughing really loud at something one said. What might he say to them to approach them?
Would he say something like “hi girls?” Or might he have an aloof expression on his face and say something like, “The expressions change, it might be laughter, it might be tears, but I guarantee you it’s only one subject”. They might likely say in curiosity something like “What’s that”. To which he might respond: “Men.”
And of course, since that’s all women talk about when they aren’t gossiping he would be right. And he would have been funny too.
What does this indicate about him?
About his knowledge of women?
About the fact that so many women know him, that he is in tune with this?
The answers to these questions are powerful, aren’t they? They are subtle indicators to women that this is a DESIRABLE guy.
And guess what?
You DON’T have to be James Bond to do it. You just have to be THE MAN.
When a woman experiences this, she feels chemistry without even realizing why.
What is happening is that the EMOTIONS she CRAVES are being stimulated. When a woman says she wants “money”, she might really mean she wants the FEELING of security, or she might mean she wants the FEELING of power. Well, by virtue of his confidence, his body language, his mannerisms, his wit, etc, THE MAN exudes power. THAT will make her feel powerful to BE with him. Security? By not being a worry wart, and by staying calm under pressure, THE MAN gives a woman the feeling of security.
When a woman says she wants “good looks”, what she means is she wants to FEEL attraction, and that she hasn’t ever met a guy who knew how to make her feel attracted without looks before. Also, sometimes when women say they want “looks”, they are often just in need of validation that THEY are worthy. Really- that’s why sometimes the women MOST hung up on looks are not hot at ALL. If you ever saw the majority of women at a male strip club, you’d know what I mean. Remove the 18-21 year old girls who just got the “age-of-majority-ID-card-high” and what you have left is pretty scary.
When you ALSO combine all these emotions with subtle expressions of sex, such as as teasing a girl, or giving her the right “look”, you MASSIVELY SKYROCKET attraction.
There is a LOT more to this, but I hope this opens a new perspective for you.
Remember, when a woman feels attraction from all this, it’s not conscious, it’s soul to soul. I call it soul to soul because in fact it is natural, it is not contrived, and it is not OVERT. It’s not direct.
The only behavior that is contrived occurs when guys try hard to impress women, but you will find that after learning these principles and practicing them, you are actually behaving as your REAL self and won’t have to even think about it.
And if you haven't yet downloaded my eBook, The Dating Wizard: Secrets to Success with Women, then do that immediately. This book lays the roadmap that you need for taking things all the way from how to meet women to getting physical and relationships. This book is where it all begins, your foundation to your incredible future with women.
Download it now at:
Till next time,
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This article has been reproduced with the permission of ©Michael W and The Dating Wizard®
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