There’s only one kind of attraction that I care about. The kind that is INSANELY POWERFUL. I mean super passionate. It’s just the kind of guy I am. Passion is about more than just LOOKS. It’s about the whole dynamic of the person.
But my point is, if a man and woman have no passion for each other, or allow themselves to fall into a rut where they have no passion, then it’s almost like sleepwalking, where you’re awake, but you’re asleep. You’re not really experiencing anything.
Mutual EXPLODING ATTRACTION is really the only way things should be in my opinion. And of course, if you want that, you have to be THE MAN. And there’s only one way to be THE MAN: You must commit to it ABSOLUTELY and COMPLETELY.
Moreover, you must EXPECT INSANELY POWERFUL RESULTS.
Yes, you must have HIGH EXPECTATIONS. Why the heck should you expect crappy results? What the hell would be your motivation then? It is a MISTAKE to take the attitude of “If it works great, and if it doesn’t, that’s okay too”. Or even the attitude of “Well, I don’t want to have too high expectations cause I don’t want to get disappointed.”
It’s not that I believe in having unrealistic expectations, it’s just that NOBODY THE HECK KNOWS what “unrealistic” REALLY IS. I have simply seen TOO MANY examples of “unrealistic” success in this area. I DO believe, however, in an attitude of NOT NEEDING external things to be happy. This is a basic fundamental. A HUGE PART of being THE MAN.
However, once you have this down pat, when you DO decide to GO for something, you go for it with everything you got and the full expectation that you will get it. NOT because you need it, not because your happiness depends on it, but because you BELIEVE in your self.
Another thing: You can’t be in two places at the same time. You can’t be thinking about SUCCESS and also FAILURE.
If you allow the negative thought in your brain, you will allow it to poison the positive thoughts. Thinking along the lines of “Well, I don’t want to get my feelings hurt, etc” is JUST NOT THE RIGHT WAY. DON’T EVEN GO DOWN THAT PATH. Your focusing on where you DON’T want to be instead of where you DO want to be. Look, imagine you were about to lift the heaviest weight you had ever attempted.
It would be BAD BAD BAD to tell yourself, “Well, I HOPE this goes okay…”
You have to be BEYOND that level of confidence, your confidence has to be I’M GONNA PUSH THIS SUCKER THROUGH THE ROOF.
Same way a guy chopping a brick in Karate is thinking two feet PAST the brick before he goes for the chop. I’m NOT SAYING to get all upset if it DOESN’T go, (after all, you are content no matter what) but don’t even FOCUS on that. If you do, you’ll for SURE f*** it up.
So what for example, do I mean by ABSOLUTE COMMITMENT TO BEING THE MAN?
Well for one thing, you must learn to have an invisible INCINERATOR around your mind so that any negative crap from the outside gets DESTROYED AND ZAPPED before it has a chance to screw up your mentality. The problem is that most guys get SUCKED IN and BOGGED DOWN by the INFINITE NEGATIVES out there, whether they come from other guys, the media, from women, from fears, from past experiences, from WHATEVER.
There is a LOT of negativity out there. I don’t even want to get into it here, suffice to say that it’s all aimed at destroying your internal positive self concept. And the SECOND you allow it to ENTER your head, it begins to spread its poison…
You must REJECT this stuff, because it affects your mind BIG TIME.
POISON INPUT = POISON OUTPUT.
I CANNOT BELIEVE HOW MUCH NEGATIVE CRAP IS OUT THERE, especially in the name of supposedly HELPING GUYS!!!!!!
There are all kinds of magazines and products out there just DYING to exploit fears and make you feel like crap so that you will feel you need this and that to be THE MAN. Sometimes, even your FRIENDS will get out their insecurities on you or their jealousy of you working on becoming THE MAN and they will discourage you.
ACTIVATE THE MENTAL INCINERATOR!!! ZAP IT!!!
Look, for every guy or article or moron who tries to give you a reason why you can’t succeed, I can point out a guy who can, did, and does. Think it’s all about height? Uhh, have you ever heard of Tom Cruise? Al Pacino? Stallone?
Think it’s all about being “good looking”? Have you heard of rock stars? Think it’s all about being famous? That one is so ridiculous since I’m sure you yourself have seen non-famous guys with hot women. Think these guys who succeed with women are “exceptions?” Well, I have news for you: TAKING THE EFFORT TO FIX UP YOUR MIND and to learn about success MAKES you an “exception”.
Why am I so INSANELY ADAMANT about this point of protecting your state of mind?
Because no matter how “perfect” you are, you are NOTHING without YOUR AWESOME EMOTIONAL STATE. I had a friend once who said, “There are no enemies, only fears”. One of the truest statements I ever heard.
So, is your internal “state” the ENTIRE “game”? No, there is ALSO knowing the realities about women, knowing body language, knowing how to dress, knowing what to expect women are going to do when you approach, knowing how to handle “shit tests” from women, knowing a general understanding of what is hip, knowing how to bridge to getting physical, knowing how to spark the kind of conversations that conveys you are THE MAN, and so on and so forth.
But WITHOUT THE RIGHT STATE OF MIND, you are HISTORY, my friend. All that stuff is useless without it.
You see, ultimately women want to be with a guy who makes them feel FEMININE and also PROTECTED and SECURE on a DEEP level. THAT is what they want from a man. And what guys don’t understand is that no matter what the hell anyone else says, the ONLY way a woman is going to feel that is if she is with a guy who TRULY HONESTLY HIMSELF FEELS MASCULINE, POWERFUL, AND SECURE and also CONVEYS this well.
NOTHING ELSE ON EARTH WILL SUBSTITUTE if a guy doesn’t feel that way about himself and convey this to a woman.
Doesn’t matter if he is loaded, doesn’t matter if he looks perfect, doesn’t matter if he is famous. Sure, it might get him some INITIAL success, because a woman might be HOPING he is the MAN based on the fact that he MIGHT be, but TRUST ME, she will dump him PRONTO when she finds out he is not. And usually that means dumping him within a few minutes of meeting him, because women are pretty practiced at meeting rich wusses, good looking wusses, high status wusses, etc.
Okay, getting back to that “making a woman feel feminine, protected, secure” stuff: All these things basically flow from a feeling that the guy is POWERFUL.
But you see, POWER in this sense is a feeling, and if YOU don’t FEEL powerful, then she won’t feel you’re powerful no matter how much external power you have. This is why I keep on hitting home the point about INTERNAL STATE. And the thing is, the truth is, that it’s actually FAR MORE DIFFICULT AND ADMIRABLE and effective to have the INTERNAL STATE than it is to ONLY have the EXTERNAL “signs” of power.
BECAUSE the reality of life is that most people, no matter how good things are going for them, no matter how rich, no matter how good looking, are still FAR FROM BEING IN THE RIGHT STATE OF MIND. They’re not much fun or inspiring to be around.
They don’t make you feel confident, or happy, or inspired, or secure. In fact, they can make you feel INSECURE, UNHAPPY, MISERABLE, and BORED.
And life is nothing but just a sum total of moments. And if most of those moments spent with someone are not that great, then who gives a damn who they are, right?
The problem is that guys think by being “nice”, they will make a woman happy. But the thing is, that women can tell when the “nice” is actually WEAKNESS, a quest of seeking approval from her. That makes HER feel INSECURE, and in fact, RIPPED OFF!!!!! Because in her mind, she figures she has the RIGHT to feel insecure but what the hell is a GUY doing acting insecure. guys are supposed to be secure – they’re allowed to be ugly, they’re allowed to screw up just about everything, but they’re NOT ALLOWED TO BE INSECURE.
So you see, my friends, THIS is a BIG PART of (but not the entire reason- sometimes some women are just plain pain in the butts, especially since guys spoil them so much) why women CONSTANTLY TEST THE LIVING DAYLIGHTS out of men.
And even if a woman IS being a pain in the butt and NOT testing you, but just acting plain “bad”, you’re STILL way better off TREATING it as if it WERE a test, because when she sees how UNAFFECTED you are, it will make her do a double take and suddenly make you WAY more intriguing and then WHAMMO BOOM – ATTRACTION kicks in. It’s a VERY powerful REFRAME where she THOUGHT you were a wuss, but suddenly realizes you’re NOT.
So you see, all women are REALLY looking for is MEN. But chances are these days, they have a better chance of finding a MANLY WOMAN than a MANLY MAN. (especially with all the women who are not feminine these days).
It’s not a sin to be “good” to a woman, it’s a sin to be a wuss to a woman.
A woman would actually appreciate a bit of chivalry IF IT WAS CLEAR THAT IT WAS COMING FROM THE MAN.
Okay, okay, so I’ve shared some really cool sh*& with you…
But I ain’t finished yet.
You see, since women test guys like crazy, it only makes sense that guys learn how to PASS these “TO BE EXPECTED” TESTS. Remember, a few generations ago, most men would have passed these tests in a SECOND. No guy in his right mind would accept the b.s. that some women throw at guys today. But today, so many guys accept it, it’s no wonder that so many women are depressed and also that they are treating men like crap.
Men need to realize that they’ve been told a lot of HOGWASH by women and men alike. The hogwash was mostly started by both men and women who over-reacted to some of the admittedly screwed up behaviors of men in the past, and also it was the reaction of some men-hating women (and maybe some self-hating men) who got into positions of power in the media.
Anyway, guys need to learn that women are just testing you to see if you are REALLY SECURE.
But to be honest with you, most guys today are NOT secure, and it’s NOT their fault, because they were FORCE FED SO MUCH B.S:
For example, b.s. like:
-That without a woman at all times, you are worthless.
-Men are bad and women are good.
-Women are inherently desirable and men are just useless Neanderthals.
-That women supposedly WANTED men who “cried”.
-That women inherently deserve to be SHOWN that you are a great, reliable, faithful and good man, while she reserves the right to not have to prove ANYTHING to you. (while she secretly flirts/dates/f*** with umpteen guys).
NO WONDER men act a little uneasy!!!
If this game were flipped around on women, there wouldn’t be enough Prozac in the world to get them through it. Meanwhile, men still take it all in stride, no Prozac required. Pretty cool, huh? So how DO YOU BECOME TOTALLY SECURE?
You need to go on a EMOTIONAL WORKOUT AND EMOTIONAL DIET:
From this moment on, start focusing on your SELF and stop trying to win women’s approval. Instead, just INCREASE your power, expand your personality, your ambitions, learn things and read voraciously, travel, develop your passionate interests if you don’t already have them, learn to improve your looks for your own sake of pride and not so you can get any particular woman. Learn how to connect with people in general, how to relate things together in a relevant way, how to have interesting and fun conversations that reflect your growing, cool personality, WITHOUT kissing up.
In other words, how would you behave if you ALREADY had the woman of your dreams? What have you been “holding off” until things “got better”? Do it now.
And learn a great sense of CONFIDENT humour, because it’s YOUR LIFE, and you may as well LAUGH and ENJOY it instead of spending all those moments all wound up in a nervous
ball of tension. After all, WHO CARES MORE ABOUT YOU THAN YOU YOURSELF? Why are you being your own worst enemy and so mean to yourself?
Do you think a woman wants a guy who needs HER permission before he can ENJOY HIS OWN LIFE AND LAUGH AT LIFE????
Next time you start taking women too seriously, slap yourself and say “I could have had a V8!!”.
You see, even though I said to have INSANELY HIGH EXPECTATIONS, the other side of the equation is to ALSO TRULY NOT NEED IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It’s almost like the attitude is “I KNOW this sh** works, and I really don’t need it! And THAT is why it’s so much fun!” Trust me, it’s WAY more fun not only for HER, but for YOU to be with a woman when in fact you know you DON’T need her. It’s a MASSIVELY INSANE HUGE IRONY that when you do all THIS, increasing your actual Superior Intrinsic Value, and your PERCEIVED Superior Intrinsic Value as conveyed by your attitude, and ONLY then, do you suddenly have women SMASHING DOWN YOUR DOOR to be in bed with you. And to want to be in relationships with you. And everything else.
But it makes sense, actually:
Because what you have done is created yourself into a person who RESONATES with power both on the external and more importantly, INTERNALLY, because YOU REALLY BELIEVE IT AND LIVE THAT WAY, AND WOMEN CAN TELL. You are NOT “acting”.
That type of self-security makes HER feel SECURE as well, because EMOTIONS ARE CATCHY.
That’s why I said at the beginning to GUARD YOUR MIND FROM POISON.
Because not only is your state of mind crucial in itself to being sexy, but it also is the key for you to do all the other things that I explain are integral to being THE MAN. Yes, it IS possible to not need a woman’s approval to feel GREAT. It just takes being weaned off a lifetime diet of lies and it takes some self-discipline to stick with it.
And then as you simultaneously develop your state of mind and yourself as a whole, and THEN also learn the concepts for success with picking up women, (including having HIGH character standards and not just “looks” standards) everything will come together not only for picking up women, but for LONGTIME success with women in terms of relationships as well.
I explain all of this stuff in detail in my book, The Dating Wizard: Secrets to Success with Women. it’s jam packed not only with the specifics of what to do to approach women and bridge into getting physical, but also with how to get into the right mind frame and keep your mind that way. Remember, the greatest gift you can give a woman is the feeling of POWER that you will resonate as THE MAN. And that’s all in the brain, so watch what you feed it.
You can download the book right now and be reading it in just a few minutes.
Till next time,
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This article has been reproduced with the permission of ©Michael W and The Dating Wizard®
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