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One of the most powerful principles for success with women I discovered completely by accident. When I first started out trying to approach women in public places, I tried to be everything- funny, energetic, smart, entertaining, up-beat, smiling, helpful- you name it.
And I tried to pack it all in as fast as I could, because I figured I only have a few seconds or a minute till she may have to go.
I figured if I don't convey VALUE to her, fast, then she might reject me, etc.
Well, I tried that for a LONG time. At most, it got me a smile, usually it got me the typical line "I got a boyfriend". One Saturday, when I was doing my approaches at the mall, then later at the university library, something happened:
As usual, I kept going up to every girl who I felt was truly a babe. No results, but I kept trying anyway, and to be blunt with you, it got EXHAUSTING as hell, dragging myself along, to the next girl, the next girl... And then I just was drained completely. So I sat down on the bench to wait for the bus. I was definitely FINISHED for the day, with NO ENERGY for this insanely difficult endeavor called meeting women.
That's when this totally gorgeous tall blonde haired girl with sophisticated looking glasses that gave her just the right balance of sexy and not a bimbo was passing by, reading a flyer on the university wall. I was too exhausted for all that stuff that I normally do, and to be honest, I was sick and tired of trying so hard with no results. I also was pretty convinced that not all women are angels, since they didn't seem to be too friendly to me.
So I just made a sarcastic comment, I don't remember exactly what it was, but it was something like "What are you doing here on a Saturday- this is pathetic". I was too tired and too desensitized to give compliments, to smile like I was being paid to. And I thought it was pretty funny that a hot babe was on campus when it's usually quite quiet Saturday night. (It's a commuter university, most students live in the city)
I really didn't give a damn what her response would be, and I couldn't believe how calm I felt. I really was just too exhausted to give a damn. AND THEN SHE SMILED AND LAUGHED. And she asked me what I was doing there, etc.
Now, this might not seem like much to you. But that was an epiphany for me.
After trying my hardest all day with nothing to show for it, here I was getting a hot babe friendly with me when I didn't give a damn, as a matter of fact when I gave her just a bit of smart-assness that I would have never dreamed to do before. As a matter of fact, I'm convinced that's WHY she was so much more open.
Now in those days I didn't realize how many signals she was giving me, and how easily I could have gotten her number or probably even an instant date with her right then. But I did learn something massive: FORGET TRYING WITH WOMEN. All that trying makes you very "un-natural" and worst of all, you act like you are in a race, a competition to try to win her attention.
Your words come out like speeding bullets, your expression looks tense, you seem like a pathetic used car salesman giving a high powered pitch at 10,000 words per minute.
RULE FOR SUCCESS WITH WOMEN: SLOW IT DOWN.
When I see a woman, I completely abandon all thoughts of trying ANYTHING. As a matter of fact, I almost feel like I am just waking out of a deep slumber, and as I approach her, it's only her awesome sex appeal that's keeping me a little awake. I am NOT about to give her a whole song and dance. I walk up SLOWLY to her, I just woke up for heaven's sake.
My expression is totally relaxed, because I have NO AGENDA, except to talk to her and get her email or number or whatever is right for us at the moment. I am absolutely not concerned in the slightest what her reaction to my approach will be. I'm just not "awake" enough to really care much one way or the other. It's almost like "I'm going to get her email or whatever now, then I'm going back to bed".
Of course, since I really don't care what her reaction will be, I am in a far better state of mind to actually come up with the most awesome responses to anything she might say. She can't get me all nervous, I'm just in a completely different zone where the whole thing is all totally under control, and moving in SLOW MOTION.
As I go up to her, I can see the entire story of this movie in my mind, and I can freeze-frame every single picture. My mind is a movie theater, where I control the projector.
The scenes in this movie are:
1.Me going up to her .
2.Me being a bit of a smart-ass.
3.Her response, which is just more ammo for me to use back on her for more smart assness.
4.Me telling her to give me her email or number, or if things are going supremely well, I'll take her to coffee right then and there.
My voice tone is lower than if I was all yippee-yay, and my pace of speech is a bit slower too.
This is all very C-O-O-L, by the way. And because we tend to get a bit over-excited by hot women, this attitude gives you the perfect balance of relaxation, alertness, and being cool.
Jitters, nerves, anxiety simply cannot live in this environment of slow motion. Kind of like how heat can't be generated unless the molecules speed up.
You want to be COOL?
The slow down EVERYTHING, let the molecules slow down for the coolness to set in.
If you want to learn to do this, then I recommend you read my ebook, The Dating Wizard: Secrets to Success with Women. I focus on how to succeed with women by getting you back to your natural masculine self. I'm not a fan of tricks and techniques for getting women, I AM a believer in attracting women by being the man you were born to be.
I also show you step by step how to go about approaching a woman, how to get numbers and emails, how to go about dating, and I also explain the best way to smoothly make the transition to getting physical. And there is a special section on relationships if you desire to pursue one and make it last while keeping it exciting and fresh.
You can begin reading this important information within MINUTES of now.
To download the eBook, just go to:
Till next time,
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This article has been reproduced with the permission of ©Michael W and The Dating Wizard®
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