If you’ve ever struggled, and I mean REALLY struggled, to be successful with women, I have good news for you. It means that once you learn the secrets, you will NEVER forget it, and you will be far better with women than guys who’ve always had it easy with women.
You see, this is part of nature’s compensation for going through what you went through. And what’s interesting, is that this idea of COMPENSATION is actually THE KEY concept to success with women.
Let me explain:
The fact of the matter is, that if a woman is attractive, she will get attention from men quite easily. Far easier than a guy who is equally attractive.
Ahhh, but what guys don’t understand is that for everything in life, there is a COUNTER balance.
Call it a COMPENSATION.
Well, for the sake of this newsletter, let me focus on just a COUPLE of these counter balances. If a woman is attractive, she tends to get BORED by most guys, since she doesn’t have to work get their attention.
Also, these women tend to also be very insecure, since most women who are attractive rely on their looks for their self-esteem, which puts them in a very fragile position. Looks are fleeting with time.
These are just TWO of some very REAL issues that most women who are attractive have to deal with- they are insecure, and they are bored. So in other words, by sheer virtue of their “luck” to be born with looks, they actually have DIFFERENT NEEDS:
-They need to be CHALLENGED.
-They need to feel DRAMA and TENSION from not knowing for sure if they’ve “got” you.
-And yet they also need to feel like they are not being valued only for their LOOKS.
What I just said in the last 2 paragraphs above is PREGNANT with lessons, with information, with LIFE-CHANGING power when it comes to your interactions with women.
Yes, women who are attractive DO have it “easy” in ONE sense, but yet that very same situation creates DIFFICULTIES for them. They are bored and insecure and they wish that life did NOT revolve only around their looks.
See how the compensation kicks in?
When I first made this realization, I felt like I had the secret to the universe in my hands. I felt like I was this superhero with power, it felt so awesome.
And then I realized that “Hey! Hold on a sec- if we as a society just stopped being so hung up on superficial things like looks, there would be no problem to begin with! Guys wouldn’t kiss up in the first place to a girl, and women wouldn’t be so focused on their looks and the power that came with it”.
The whole “power” thing is ridiculous, because WE as men created the “problem” as well!
Understand the problem, and you then have the “power” or the solution as well.
And the solution makes total sense:
If the whole problem came from kissing up to “hotties” by virtue of their looks, then the solution is to REVERSE that.
Stop kissing up to “knock-outs”. As a matter of fact, give them a hard time. This is what they NEED and REALLY WANT.
It makes SENSE when you think about it.
And stop commenting on their LOOKS. For Pete’s sake, that’s the LAST thing they need or want to hear. That just either bores them or makes them feel even more that the only thing in life that counts for them is their looks, which really is depressing to them, although they won’t reveal this to you. Sure, they want to be pretty, but more than that, they NEED to feel that there is more to them than that.
You are actually being “NICER” to a “hottie” by making her work for your attention, and by being a challenge and unpredictable, and if you make a compliment, make it something about her character and not her looks. And for Pete’s sake, make it genuine or don’t make it at all. If she really has nothing good about her, then what the heck are you doing with her?
Have some STANDARDS, for crying out loud.
Personally, I’m not a “player” and never was. I don’t enjoy “scoring” just to put a notch on my bed. I have to feel like I actually ENJOY the person I am with.
It’s not a game to me per se, although I do enjoy the process of learning how the dynamics work.
And I don’t think that most guys, deep down, are out to show off how many women they had sex with. I always feel like laughing when I hear guys talking about how they “only” scored with 5, 10, 15, 20, 90, or 1000 chicks. And how they’re not sure if they are manly yet or not.
Reminds me of the joke about the difference between a tire and 365 condoms. (write in to me if you haven’t heard this joke and I’ll tell you. See, I’m keeping YOU in limbo now…just don’t get any romantic ideas lol). Damn, if you need approval of another guy to know if you “scored” enough to be a man, you seriously need self-esteem.
Being THE MAN means you do what YOU want, not what other guys tell you to want.
So to give you some concrete examples of giving hotties a challenge:
1. Tease them. For example, I was at a coffee shop once and a chick had these earrings that looked like several circles cuffed on each other. After some chit-chat, I teased her “nice handcuff earrings, I see you’re into S&M. Great, me too”. Instantly, the dynamics changed, she had this Look- a mix of WTF?! and yet a smile too-, leading the way to CHARGED conversation, some playful contact, etc.
2. Don’t answer their questions/don’t give in to the temptation to be easy or “nice”. (remember, the real nice thing to do is make her excited). These situations are your opportunities to excite her, but if you give in, she will be bored stiff with you. She needs a challenge.
So for example, if she asks you to do something for her, tell her she can’t afford your price. If she screws up while doing something for you, (i.e. a clerk at a counter), tell her she’s fired. That will probably make her laugh and screw up again, in which case you should bust on her again, and tell her you need to see the manager.
3. Don’t jump into relationship talk. They’re bombarded with relationship talk from every guy on the street. If they want a relationship, they’ll let you know, and of course don’t jump then either!
4. Leave them a bit in limbo. So if they had a great evening with you, and vice versa, don’t wax on about it. Let her think about it, let her wonder if you dig her or not. She ENJOYS this, because she hasn’t had to WONDER about a guy in her life before. Give her the gift of WONDER.
And if you want to know more about how to REALLY be “nice” to a woman so that you are actually giving her what she REALLY wants, then don’t waste any time. Go download my eBook, The Dating Wizard: Secrets to Success with Women. It lays the roadmap that you need to know for taking things all the way from how to meet women to getting physical and relationships.
Download it now at:
Till next time,
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This article has been reproduced with the permission of ©Michael W and The Dating Wizard®
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