One of the things that is a simple fact is that a woman who is attractive will always test a guy before allowing herself to be with him.
They have always done this, and they ESPECIALLY do it today. There are ALL KINDS of reasons for this, ranging from being spoiled (these days especially) to more noble reasons such as a girl not wanting to be "cheap" and having high self-esteem and showing she has standards, etc.
It's REALLY important to realize that even a girl with the SWEETEST of personalities will test a guy during the initial pick-up and sometimes beyond as well. The key difference is that a girl who is sweet will test a guy in a way that is not b-i-t--c-h--y, but she will still throw him tests, she will try to "JAM" his radar, try to throw him off, try to discourage him, try to make him feel he has no chance with her.
Let me give you a few examples:
1. While initially chatting to her, she may tell you that her background is too different from yours and that she's sorry but she guesses it won't work and have a nice day. (This actually happened to me in real life with a girl who ended up being a great long term relationship!)
2. She may tell you she is in a rush and can't talk.
3. She may chat with you for a good TWENTY minutes where clearly you were cool, witty, and dominant, and STILL she may suddenly put up a struggle with giving you her number and tell you that she really has to get going, and that maybe "you'll see her around" even though you KNOW she LOVED the chat.
4. All the above is from real life pickups. But for example, online, you may have a girl chat with you for a while and you know she is enjoying it and that she hasn't had as cool of a guy chat with her before, and still she may be reluctant to send you a pic.
I could go on and on, forever, but I think you get the idea.
It's SO important to be able to KNOW what is really going on in these situations. Sometimes, yes, the girl is being genuine and she really does have to go. But MOST of the time, or at least DAMN OFTEN, she is simply TESTING YOU or she is feeling that she is simply playing a ROLE of hard to get.
Either way, you CAN'T accept what she says at face value, or you will get NOWHERE.
The key to responding to her tests is to NEVER get upset, and yet also to know where to draw the line. If a woman is being outright RUDE, then even though you CAN get her, she is going to be TROUBLE and you should weed her OUT of your life right then and there.
But let's say a woman tells you something like "Oh, I'm of such and such background, (very different than yours) sorry!"
If you accept that, she is thinking to herself, "What a pathetic guy! If he REALLY wanted me, he would understand that I have to play a little hard to get, and plus if he was REALLY a MAN, he would not be deterred by such an innocent "act" that is not insulting you at all."
And she is thinking:
"I don't WANT a guy who doesn't really want me."
NOTE: WANTING a woman is VERY different than being NEEDY for her. I mean VERY VERY VERY different.
You ever hear a woman say she wants a man "Who knows what he wants and knows how to get it"??? That's because she's talking about things like CONFIDENCE and KNOWING what you want, including wanting HER, and wanting YOU to know how to GET her.
If she has to TEACH you how to get her, then it's not going to be attractive to her at all.
So, if a woman gives you a reason why she has to go, OVER-RIDE it with something INTERESTING and EMOTIONALLY RELEVANT, don't ARGUE LOGICALLY with her. Either CONTINUE the pick-up as if she didn't even say anything negative, or you can sometimes CALL HER ON HER HARD TO GET ACT but do it in a confident, playful way that reframes her behavior as a sign of a compliment to you:
i.e. "Are you always this hard to get with guys that you like?"
Sometimes girls actually feel UNCOMFORTABLE when they are feeling ATTRACTION very FAST, which is what happens when you get good at this stuff.
So what a girl will do is try to JAM your game and mess YOUR THOUGHTS AND CONFIDENCE up as she's afraid that if she doesn't mess you up, she's going to end up in bed with a guy that she hardly knows (you) simply because she feels ATTRACTED to you.
So for example, she may suddenly tell you, after you have attracted her and intrigued her and made her feel like you are one in a billion, she may say:
She really means "You're UNBELIEVABLE" but to give you such a compliment, unless SHE is super confident herself, well she feels to give you such a compliment so fast would render her vulnerable.
The key then is not to RIP her to shreds verbally for saying "You're odd" but also not to accept her words either.
Again, REFRAME, because the truth is, It IS a compliment.
"So what makes you so attracted to odd?"
This leads me to a SECOND major point, related to this whole shit test thing, but also important in GENERAL in all pick-ups.
YOU MUST BE SUPERIOR TO HER
I was the guy who said this long ago, and it was massively politically incorrect. And yet, if you know me, you know that I am not into thinking of women as "hos and b***ches" and I actually enjoy a relationship when I'm in it. I do respect women, believe it or not. HOWEVER, I ALSO know that attraction is a ruthless thing, and that superiority IS essential.
What do I mean by this?
Being WITTIER than her.
Being FUNNIER than her.
Being MORE dominant than her.
Being FASTER in response than her.
Being SHARPER than her.
Having more CONVICTION in your frame than she does in hers.
Better use of tonality.
Better ability to lead a group and withstand social pressure.
Greater status, even if it comes from simply being better with PEOPLE.
And much more.
Do you have to be ALL these things?
No, but the idea is to be as powerful as possible.
This is the ruthless reality of attraction.
When a hottie SENSES this, it's RARE. Usually, she OWNS the guy. And here, with you, when you have these skills, you are OWNING the frame, you are KICKING butt, and she knows it.
And the craziest thing of all, is that she LOVES it.
She doesn't WANT to WIN!
If she "wins" over the guy, she feels she has LOST.
But she can't just LET you win, as that's not a real win.
Hence, we get back to the first point, the TESTS.
And yet, the more COOL you are in general, the LESS of course she will ever need to TEST you.
Remember, also that WINNING can ONLY come from being SMOOTH. If you think that getting angry is a form of dominance, you're wrong, at least when it comes to the actual pick-up.
Now, getting AGGRESSIVE when getting physical with a woman is something else, and there's a time and place for everything, but that's not really the same as anger.
Another CRITICAL point I want to make is that when I say that you don't need any GIMMICKS to attract a woman, that doesn't mean that there isn't WORK to be done.
In fact, becoming a true NATURAL with women is the HARDEST TRAINING you will ever find yourself doing on EARTH.
The reason for this is because this attraction is flowing from the power of your PERSONALITY, which means you must develop and build the characteristics inside of yourself just like a natural bodybuilder develops his muscles to the greatest development possible with arduous effort in the gym.
And to quote Arnold, who once said that the greatest feeling in the world comes from the PUMP that you feel in the muscles that you get from lifting weights, so too with enhancing the sexy personality traits that are in you right now and are waiting to BLOSSOM as you build them up to PEAK levels, it requires EFFORT, but is at the same time ENJOYABLE.
The feeling is AWESOME.
I'm not just talking about the RESULTS you get with women, of course that's awesome, but I'm talking about the FEELING you get FROM developing these traits and emotions within you.
It's hard work, and sometimes you have to take it ONE trait at a time.
For example, at first, you may have to just work on being more DOMINANT.
But that's just a first step, as you then have to LAYER IN other traits, such as being PLAYFUL.
Then, another trait can be layered in, such as being INTRIGUING.
Then, more SEXUAL. Then, more UPBEAT. Then, learning to develop a more "WARM INNER GLOW".
One last point I want to mention, and that is the PHYSICAL SET UP you encounter when you are doing pick-up.
If you approach a group of women or one woman who is SEATED, and there are no SEATS for YOU, then it's going to look weird if you STAND the entire time while she gets to be comfy and sitting. It makes YOU look like you are TRYING hard. After all, she is all comfy and you are standing.
And of course, if there IS a place to sit and you STILL stand, then you look not only as if you are trying hard, but you also look as if you are afraid to make yourself comfortable, as if you needed her permission or invitation to sit down.
So, always strive to make yourself COMFORTABLE. If there are no seats, then at least lean against the wall if possible. Don't EXAGGERATE these things, just get comfortable.
I really do want every single good guy to succeed with women, and I believe that's a realistic goal if any guy is COMMITTED to this skill.
These newsletters are great stuff, but I can only get into very low level detail here as there is truly a MOUNTAIN of IMPORTANT INSIGHTS to understand when it comes to this skill, which by the way is not only about attracting her in the first place, but also about developing the kind of bond that makes her want to STAY with you.
If you want to get RESULTS with women, and you are prepared to put in the effort, then I really believe you owe it to yourself to get my SEDUCTION MASTERY APPRENTICESHIP PROGRAM CD SET.
I would have done ANYTHING to have had this program when I was starting out. It would have saved me YEARS of agony and YEARS of wasted time. This program is the cream-of-the-crop of home study programs on the topic of dating and attraction and getting RESULTS with women.
With such an incredible program, you may wonder what is the point of a LIVE program where I take you out for REAL and teach you in person.
The point is that having the CD Program WILL massively help you get results. In fact, 99% of the guys who come to BOOTCAMP were so pleased with the CDs, that they just HAD to experience THE NEXT LEVEL as well, and the only way to do that is in PERSON.
By learning in PERSON, you will get the chance to integrate these skills as fast as possible. In only THREE DAYS, you will see tremendous growth. I'm not promising you MIRACLES, BUT I AM SAYING MASSIVE GROWTH.
Here's what a recent client, Charles, from Wisconsin, had to say about his training just a few weeks ago:
"It's hard to describe the boot camp experience in words other than say it was just one hell of an experience. I learnt so much in a span of three days. It has not only totally improved my interactions with women, but it has also enhanced the way I see the powerful role emotions play in life in general.
It was well worth the investment (I mean it when I say it - I am a grad student who doesn't have money to throw around).
Before the boot camp I never really understood how everything gelled together, even though when considered separately different aspects of pick up made absolute sense. During the boot camp all of these different aspects of pickup from initiating a conversation, to building rapport, through to escalating physically began to make complete sense as a whole.
By the third night I had improved tremendously, from getting girls attracted and building up physical intimacy in clubs, to getting girls at shops during the day attracted, and establishing a genuine bond, and giving me their contact info.
To me the crowning point of glory was Michael saying 'Man, you make me proud'. I can't tell you how great that felt when I heard it because before the boot camp started I had had extremely limited interactions with women (let alone groups of women) in bars and certainly not even one of them progressed as well.
Another aspect that was totally congruent to the way I view life and learning is that Michael focuses on why 'a component of pickup' works as opposed to giving you a technique which you have to memorize and use.
This greater understanding enabled me to come up with my own stories, conversation threads and even develop a better sense of fashion congruent with my personality.
Lastly and probably most importantly over the three days you repeatedly understand the importance of not only having a great inner state but also how to fight through and develop a great inner state when you are not in a great state. And of course once you are in 'state' the whole process becomes so much easier and natural.
After the boot camp I have easily come to a stage where I am able to learn and fine tune my skills on my own. This is certainly not to say I have accomplished everything and conquered all challenges. I still feel challenged, but I now look forward to interactions with a sense of understanding, calmness and confidence which really I never had before."
***That's a real letter from a real dude, and it really was cool for me to see this guy grow.
One thing about this dude, is that although he may not have had results BEFORE, he brought a TOTAL commitment and a fantastic attitude to Bootcamp.
So he was ready to really follow instruction and get the MOST out of things.
Everyone learns at a different pace, the KEY though is that YOU will make SERIOUS PROGRESS.
And definitely, if you haven't yet read my eBook, "The Dating Wizard: Secrets to Success with Women", then download it IMMEDIATELY. You can be reading it and using it to meet more women right NOW.
Till next time,
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This article has been reproduced with the permission of ©Michael W and The Dating Wizard®
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