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Women dream every day of having a cool, confident guy approach them and make them smile in their day-to-day lives. They don't want to have to wait until 1:15 at the bar on a Friday for some drunken fool to make his move before the lights come on.
They want you to come talk to them at the gym, the coffee shop, and the supermarket. They want you to approach at happy hour and when they are at dinner.
Basically, there's never a bad time to sweep a girl off her feet.
But the tough part is doing this when you feel the "paralysis" you describe. Some people call it "approach anxiety." But it's deeper than that. It's a real fear, with real physical causes.
Think about it. When you are in high school, everyone knows exactly which cool guys are allowed to date the cutest girls, and if you aren't one of the guys and you try to make a move, you know there's a real chance one of those guys will beat you up.
The fear of talking to beautiful women is a physical fear. It's real. It's not made up, and it's not something you can just fight your way through with mantras and stubborness.
But you CAN learn to manage it by practicing the right skills with your body.
We teach a technique in the Art of Attraction that anyone can use to minimize and manage the nerves that come over you when you want to approach a cute girl. Now you can practice this at home.
Here's the quick version. Ready? Now play along at home:
1. First, stand relaxed. Let your shoulders drop back. Let your jaw hang open. Make sure your jaw isn't clenched. Keep your mouth open.
2. Breathe deep through your mouth and nose.
Fill your lungs and empty them. You'd be shocked to see how many students we have
come in who are just fine until they think about talking to a cute girl, and then the
first thing they do is stop breathing.
We have a simple rule around here. No matter what technique you use, always remember to breathe!
3. OK, now, nod your head slowly, and repeat under your breath, "yeah, yeah, yeah..."
Get some music playing in your mind. Something that makes you happy and feeling good. Personally, I like Tupac's "I Get Around."
Now, keep your head moving, and keep the music playing, and repeat these three simple mantras to yourself.
"I look like a goofball."
Keep nodding, and say, "Yeah..."
"Sean has no fucking idea what he's talking about."
Keep nodding, and say, "Yeah..."
"She's gonna think I'm fucking retarded."
"Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!"
Now at this point, you will have absolutely cracked a smile. Your head is still nodding, so you cannot think negative thoughts. Your face is relaxed from smiling, so you can't store too much tension.
And if you're still not feeling it, go with our super-secret anxiety annihiltor move:
Smack your own ass.
Go ahead. I fucking dare you to do that, for real, and not crack up. Golden rule... cracking the ham always leads to cracking up. You are now a professional spanker out to find some ladies who need your expert help!
Your body is relaxed, and you mind is focused on feeling goofy and having fun, so you can't get nervous about looking cool.
When we did this exercise in our last New York Art of Attraction, it worked so well with one student he admitted he was less nervous talking to the hottest girls in the city that night than he'd ever been just speaking up at work.
Your body is what makes you nervous, and your body is what can calm you down.
Our students use this technique every day to overcome the very real "paralysis" that
all guys get when talking to beautiful women.
You can too. And the more you do this, the less you need it, and the easier it gets.
Matter of fact, after a while, it's tougher to NOT approach cute girls than to walk over there.
Now, get yourself laughing, and go talk to some women!
Check out the Physical Confidence Course on how to get women drawn to you by your attractive body language.
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